I’m feeling kinda beat up today so I thought i’d start a new list if things that will make your IT guy jump off a bridge. Most of the time just one instance of these things will only annoy him or her but cumulatively they should be sufficient to cause mental breakdown. I will update this post over time to reflect new tactics my users have used on me and my coworkers.

1- Start your emails with the phrase “I know I’m supposed to put in a ticket, but…”

2- spend time putting a pretty background and a totally unreadable font for your email, then call for help because you can’t figure out MS Word.

3- come by at lunch to ask us technical questions. Bonus points if it is about your home system. Double bonus points if it is about the system at your side business. Be sure to acknowledge that you are interrupting an otherwise quiet and peaceful meal.

4- Make up something work related to call about so you can nag about not being able to use E-bay from your WORK computer.

5- Learn, and use “computer guy” lingo. Refuse to use it correctly. Be sure to note in our satisfaction surveys how rude it was of your technician to correct you.

UPDATE:

6- Open the program of your choice, then pick up your keyboard and mouse by the cord… swing them around above your head, being sure to hit walls, desks, co-workers, etc in such a way that multiple settings are changed and you have no possible way of knowing what you did. BONUS: Tell the IT Guy you were just trying to change your email signature.

7- When filling out the survey, be sure to point out that 5 hours was far to long of a response time for a 3-day response time ticket. It makes us happy.

8- NEVER, I mean NEVER clean the dust off your computer. This way, when you call us because your keyboard is unplugged (because you kicked the cable) we get a face full of dust, and you can say “Whew, that sure is dusty! I’ll bet that’s the dustiest computer you’ve ever seen!”. You’d be wrong.

Ann and I have started back in our life group after some time away on break (more for my benefit than hers). I love walking along with my friends and fellow believers through good stuff and bad stuff, but for me it can be very emotionally draining.

The great thing about being in a great life group is the real God moments that happen even when you aren’t the one sharing, and sometimes when you are caught up in trying to support someone else. When you least expect it, someone says a few words that cut directly into your situation when in reality they are responding to another person across the room.

This week we ended up on the topic of failure, more specifically how fear paralyzes us and keeps us from accomplishing God’s purpose for our lives. We were all rallying around and supporting a couple who are dealing with the call God has on their life, but are kinda stuck on how they’ll make it work. It’s a big step for them, and it would be a big step for anyone their age and with their current responsibilities.

Out of the corner, someone says “Wait a minute… Who are you worried about failing?” (or something like that). If you are following God’s purpose, and you know you are following Him, what failures are you worried about?

Man, that guy really read my mail.

Every day, I worry. I worry about paying the bills. I worry that something will happen and I’ll lose my job. How will my family survive? Will my wife be disappointed in me? Can I man up and ask for help if this month, the power bill just can’t fit the equation?

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m blessed beyond belief. I’m not rich. Sometimes there’s way more month than money, but God hasn’t let me down yet. I’ve kept ALL of the needs and a great many of the wants with only the minimal sacrifice on my part. Does that stop me from worrying? Not a chance.

It would be easy to say that if I was following God’s purpose, I wouldn’t worry about it. I think in most areas of my life I am following His purpose, but I’m a work in progress and I understand that I don’t get all the things God has planned for me yet. That’s easy to say when you don’t think God has called you (specifically) to sell everything you have and move to Africa. If I did believe that, I’d be just as scared as these folks (who aren’t being called to Africa, at least not yet).

Andy Stanley had a great Podcast last week about Joseph (the coat of many colors, not the husband of Mary). The question he asked was “How would you live… what would you do, if you absolutely certain God was with you?”

It’s a question I’d love to say that I have the answer to, but I don’t. It’s certainly a great question, though. How would I live my daily life if I really truly believed that God stands beside me every minute of every day?

I’ll admit that I know it, but I don’t know that I really have the heart knowledge yet. I still life a life plagued by fear and for now my prayer is this: God, reveal yourself to me in a way that I know that you really truly have the drivers seat under control. Help me to see you as less of a fall back plan, and more of who you are: The one in control.

It’s a ramble, but it’s what’s circulating in my brain this week.

As of late, many public figures have had their adulterous affairs dragged into the public light. David Letterman, Mark Sanford and many more have had to stand in the spotlight and make the embarrassing announcement that they had been unfaithful to their spouses.
Thankfully, none of that is going on at my house… at least not in my marriage.

As you may know, I make my living as a Network Specialist or as most of you would call it: I’m an IT guy. Most of you also know that by it’s nature I use the Microsoft Windows platform almost exclusively in my work and linux in my personal life. Sure, I use Vista at home a lot (don’t laugh) because:
A) It came with the computer. and

B) Some stuff just doesn’t work on Linux, sadly (Something that is changing all the time.

Last night over sushi I made an impulsive decision. I looked my wife right in the eye and said “I’m going across the parking lot and buying an iPod Touch.”
You’re probably saying to yourself “Wait a second… don’t you make fun of people who buy Apple products?”

Yep. I do, and for the most part that’s not going to change. I still contend that their main products (desktops and notebooks) are overpriced. I can do everything I need to do with Windows or Linux for about 1/3 the price of a Mac. I don’t forsee that changing any time soon. Now, as most of my friends will tell you, I actually have another dirty little secret. I think Apple has the better OS when you compare it with Windows.

To be fair, BMW makes a better car than Chevrolet.  The difference is not which one gets me from A-to-B, it’s which one keeps me from filing bankruptcy. Oh, sure… the BMW gets me there more comfortably and with more style but it doesn’t get me there any faster or more effectively.

I’m not going to get any deeper into the Mac/PC debate, but that’s where I am on the issue.

The iPod Touch, though. Now that’s a product I can have an affair with. We spent the bigger part of the day together today. It was nice. I browsed. I updated Facebook and Twitter. I played piano, and even listened to some music. The real addiction, though comes in Podcasts. I’ve heard about podcasts for a while but on my other MP3 player I had to manually download and sync them. It was a hassle. I hate hassles, so I didn’t take advantage of podcasts.
Not now. I’ve been awakened to the wonderful world of the iPod/iTunes combo. Glorious. Got my favorite shows all downloaded and had a great drive to and from work!

I’d love it if they would get all the functionality of iTunes on the Linux platform, but until then I’m going to have my dirty little affair with Apple. Maybe someday I’ll divorce my Windows systems and move on with my life. Things between us haven’t always been great, but it’s comfortable.